Back to school is approaching and this year is going to be pretty tough as my youngest baby is off to school for the first time. While I am so excited for him, my heart is breaking as “Back to School” quickly approaches.
For the last three years it has been the two of us from 8am-2pm. We would adventure around town, have lunch together and end up under the sun at one of the local parks waiting for his big brother to get out of school. Looking back on it, I wish I would have soaked it in a little more.
I caught myself, the other day, thinking about our time together and planning adventures for us this fall. I quickly stopped myself, remembering that he will be off at school on his own adventure. What does this mean for me? Well I’m putting those hours of focus back into work.
That’s a blissful thing; reclaiming my identity, something I’ve struggled with the last few years. Prior to kids I was a busy bee, working as much as I could while also in school. After having our first son, I felt so blessed to be able to stay home with him, even though sometimes that also felt like I was pressing pause on my career.
Motherhood came at a weird time in life for me. I was still finishing up college when my son was born, a time I envisioned myself soon starting an exciting new career. The two worlds clashed like water and oil; late nights with zero sleep & spit up all over my clothes (which were just sweatpants & t-shirts, but thats also something that clashes with a career). The two worlds were so opposite I felt like I needed to pick one; and my heart was at home, being a mom. As they say, the days were long but the years were fast and that saying could not feel anymore true.
I love that my kids are fearlessly facing the world on their own, enjoying school and learning new things; but that piece of me that loves holding them close is just over here cheering them on, with kisses goodbye, and tears rolling down my cheek.
If you are preparing for back to school, check out Destin 30a Moms Blogs “back to school” shopping link!
Also read our “Back to school supply list for Mom’s“
